It's been said " Treat others like you like to be treated". But a new twist to that saying i believe is much more accurate " Treat others not like you like to be treated" but rather " Treat others like they like to be treated". The difference? Can you imagine a masochist treating you like they want to be treated? Unless your gratified by humiliation and degradation by your partner, then obviously, you're not going to appreciate in the slightest, your partner treating you like they want to be treated.
It's easy to just treat your partner like you want to be treated. To treat your partner like they want to be treated requires you to educate yourself about your partner, to find out exactly what your partner wants and needs in a relationship, their likes and dislikes, whether it be food, vacations, etc. Not try to forcefully change them, by accepting who they are will make you more relaxed and will make your partner comfortable with you. You don't want your partner to feel coerced, forced to do something only you like and greatly enjoy. They may reluctantly agree to eat food they dislike, skydive, go on a thrilling ride on a roller coaster or bungee jump, but not without causing extreme discomfort and stress to your partner. It's always best to suggest, not bully your partner in anything you decide to do together. Some may say, "if i did not nag my partner over and over", they would have never experienced something that they now have come to enjoy. You have to ask yourself, what if they are just saying that to please you but dread the next time you will experience something they hate to do. Sooner or later, your partner may over time, resent you and emotionally distance themselves from you, which will surely make your relationship a fragile one. One of the most important things to remember before entering a relationship, is to not ignore red flags, be selective in who you choose.
A relationship held together with guilt, fear, manipulation is a weak glue that will not last, even it it does, not a happy one. A truly happy relationship should feel good, emotionally satisfying not just for you, but for them as well.
